March is a month full of birthdays for us. I have my fathers, two nephews and most importantly two of my girls; Mia and Kirstie. Mia is one of my chronies.
So at this time last year we had her party fully planned out. She was so excited. And of course being the pinterest pinning momma that I am I had it fully planned out with a troll theme, troll cake, troll games, troll favors…… well you get the gist.
Unfortunately although March is a birthday month, there are still doctors appointments to be had and procedures to go to. Mia had her colonoscopy planned about five days ahead of her birthday. A quick one day procedure (if you don’t count that horrid prep), and then plenty of time to recover before her party.
As with most things, Mia’s colonoscopy did not go as planned and there were complications. Mia doesn’t do anything easy. There are always complications. I should have known better. So we earned a five-day stay in the hospital. Her birthday party had to be cancelled. Another stolen moment.
I find that our life is full of stolen moments. Pieces of time that the rest of the “normal” world takes for granted. Birthday parties that have to be cancelled and rescheduled, dance recitals that were practiced for all year long that were missed due to Salmonella, the Fourth of July fireworks we watched from the hospital room when she had HLH, counting down and watching the ball drop on New Year’s Eve in the ER because of corona virus……… there are no other words than it just plain SUCKS.
I want to scream sometimes…..give me my moments back! Give Mia her moments back! There is no use though, they are lost in time and we can’t retrieve them no matter how hard we try. Our hearts break for our children and the things that they missed. Our hearts break for their siblings for the moments that were stolen from them. Our hearts break for us because we can never have a moment with our guard down because we don’t know what is lying around the corner. It is so unfair.
So what can we do? We celebrate birthdays in the hospital and make it the best darn hospital birthday it can be, and then we reschedule the party and hope that the friends can still come. We count down and watch the ball drop in the ER and scream Happy New Year and laugh as everyone looks at us like we are crazy. We ask the dance teacher and dance moms if we can have a mini recital in the middle of July because the show must go on. Even for us the show must go on.
While we may never get out stolen moments back……we make new ones. They may not be what we planned, but they are all we got. So when life throws lemons our way, we don’t just make lemonade, we add some vodka and have a full blown out party at the lemonade stand.